“Why do I think everyone is out to get me?”
“Why am I feeling like everyone is against me?”
These questions have riddled most of our minds.
Believe it or not, the ‘me vs. world mentality’ is way more common than you think.
A lot of us feel like we are unfairly pitted against the world. Our life experiences sometimes solidify these thought patterns. Failure, social rejection, and loss of crucial opportunities can inflate these thoughts.
This ‘feeling like the world is against me’ state makes us feel threatened in whatever step we take. It instills a sense of paranoia. You become cautious of everyone around you, believing they have some nefarious motives.
Now, being careful isn’t a bad thing in and of itself. However, if this level of vigilance has left you on a high alert and you find yourself questioning the motivations of everyone you encounter, there could be something more at work.
Let us dig into the reasons behind encountering questions like ‘why do I feel everyone is out to get me.’ We will also discuss how these thoughts might sabotage your progress in life and the proper remedies to alleviate these feelings.
Let Us First Know, What Causes These ‘Feeling Like Everyone Is Against Me’ Thoughts?
A variety of issues can leave someone feeling like everyone is against them. Everyone has different reasons for having these doubts. It could stem from an inherent lack of trust, cruelty or injustice, etc. Here are the common reasons behind these feelings:
1. Difficult Childhood
The next time you wonder ‘why do I think everyone is out to get me,’ we want you to analyze these thoughts carefully. Try to figure out what experiences in your life have these beliefs tied with them.
Wondering why are we asking you to dive into your memories of the past?
Well, this type of belief pattern is frequently the result of previous life experiences.
We are living from a position of mistrust when we are suspicious of others and feel the need to be on our guard at all times.
Our first relationship as kids is with our family members. These relationships are extremely important in shaping us as individuals. This is because we are most vulnerable as children. As youngsters, we are nearly wholly reliant on adults and put our trust in them.
If you have trouble trusting people, look back at your early connections. Did you have a sense of safety and security? Was your family supportive and protective of you? Did you feel cared for and supported?
Your lack of trust in others might stem from the fact that you never had anyone earn your trust as a child. Perhaps your parents dealt with personal issues, bickered frequently, or were emotionally unstable. Maybe those who were supposed to be on your side and guide you ended up betraying you somehow. Perhaps you were subjected to cruelty or abuse (verbal, emotional, or physical) by your parents, siblings, or someone else.
If trust is never established, it will color one’s view of the world. It takes time to earn someone’s trust. If we’ve never known to be safe as a child, we’ll be hesitant to give it out as freely as adults.
2. Low Self Esteem
The questions like ‘why do I think everyone is out to get me’ might also be an illusion that arises from low self-esteem.
When we are under confident or struggle with insecurity, the feelings of ‘me vs. the world’ flare up. Due to your insecurity, you might struggle to make conversations with people. You might begin to feel like people refuse to show interest in talking to you.
Low self-esteem can distort one’s perception of how one sees life. It makes them see people as more hostile and negative than they actually are.
3. Mental Health Conditions
We all might experience moderate paranoia from time to time (for example, believing that people are laughing at us or worrying excessively about getting laid off). However, it could indicate mental illness if these ideas persist over a lengthy period. Schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, and paranoid personality disorder (PPD) all have paranoid thoughts as a symptom.
Therapy can help you identify the source of your problems and re-establish a trusting relationship. Your therapist might be able to assist you in resolving the dynamics of past betrayals so that you can express your hurt where it is due. When that happens, you open yourself up to experiencing love and trust in others as well as the world around you.
How Are The Me vs. The World Feelings Sabotaging Your Life?
Living on the defensive can lead to several other problems. The way we interpret other people’s intentions impacts our worldly perceptions. If we walk through life suspicious and paranoid, we’ll have a horrible time (to say the least).
Here are a few ways in which this thought process is sabotaging your life and relationships:
1. Severed Relationships:
Our connections are likely to suffer due to this skewed perspective.
The ability to be vulnerable helps to build deep connections and partnerships. But we can never totally commit to a relationship if we are constantly on guard. We end up alienating and isolating ourselves from our loved ones.
Paranoia also makes you constantly judge other people and their actions. You become so focused on out-doing others that you lose your precious relationships.
2. Half-hearted Attempts To Do Things:
When you constantly live through life feeling like the world is against you, you refuse to give your best shot at whatever you are trying to do. You always feel the odds stacked against you. Hence, you give up mentally long before you have actually started investing your best efforts.
These half-hearted attempts devoid you of the ability to achieve success. Continued failures reinforce these thoughts, and the toxic cycle becomes never-ending.
The Solution To ‘ Why Do I Think Everyone Is Out To Ge Me’ Thoughts
What if you flipped the situation in your head? What if you assumed that everything in the world is genuinely there to assist you? Maybe even the negative things because they help us evolve and grow. It is referred to as pronoia. Yes, you guessed it right, the opposite of paranoia.
This beautiful line from Paulo Coelho’s ‘The Alchemist,’ conveys our thoughts perfectly –
“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”
Nobody can deny bad things happen, but there is also a lot of good in the world. That is something you should never forget. There are many friendly people out there, including yourself, who want the best for you.
The fascinating thing about trust is that it comes down to us in the end. We must learn to put our faith in our judgment. It is we who have to develop the courage to be vulnerable. We have to build enough confidence in ourselves to make that decision and let things take their course.
And if things don’t turn out the way you wanted them to, put your trust in the fact that you will do better the next time.
Nobody is perfect, neither you nor someone else. Those nagging voices in your mind that tell you that ‘everyone is out to get you’ or ‘you are not doing enough’ are lying. You are doing great. You are doing enough. You are enough. Yes. Just as you are. Right at this moment.
Now that you understand the answer to ‘why do I think everyone is out to get me,’ let’s help you deduce the answer to another important question. Are you wondering how you can control your thoughts and emotions? Well, we have a solution for you. To know more about managing your overwhelming feelings, click here.
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